Hello, my name is Tara and I'm a control freak.
There I've said it. I have a need to be in control, to do it on my terms (whatever they are) or else not do it at all. Mostly, I can get away with it and no-one need know the internal struggle occurring but sometimes I have leakage - today quite literally!
Nick asked me to train today in the area of the gym today that i really don't like - it has something (still unexplained) to do with the floor (black, vile, grubby - so that's explained it then!) and it being, despite the high ceilings claustrophobic. He then asked me to do something I really don't like doing, surrounded by quite a few people and I proceeded to freak out.
I tried to do what i was asked - I really did, but my mind just wouldn't let me and I physically just stopped functioning and then cried. Like a girl.
Poor Nick, coped with it as the consummate professional that he is and whisked me away to a slightly more open, less people, less mirrored part of the gym and let me take my frustrations with myself on his best kettlebell (Don't knock it until you've tried it!!)
I'm actually a strong believer in mind over matter (child birth with no pain relief anyone?!!) but what do you do when it is your mind that is the matter?
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2 comments:
"what do you do when it is your mind that is the matter?" - Yeah, that's a question I'd like the answer to as well. It's oddly comforting to know that there are others out there that freak out when events or people "force" them to do things they really really don't want to do even when you know there's no justifable reason for not doing it.
The brain is really good at filtering in and out information: you have to pay attention to pain in order for it to hurt. Brain imaging studies have shown that during hypnosis you don't just feel the pain but report that it's okay, you actually reduce your perception of pain. It seems that we have more control over our bodies than we give ourselves credit for. It could just be that a way of dealing with stressful situations is learning to focus your attention on other things than the thing that is stressing you, especially if you know the way you think or feel about it may seem slightly bonkers to other people! However I think you had a perfectly normal reaction to an uncomfortable situation, so there isn't actually anything the matter with your mind, its just your viewpoint was different to that of Nick.
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